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struggling faith

lost and distant

please find me, Jesus

i’m searching

for You

 

where are you?

i know

this won’t last

“joy in the morning”

and all that

but still,

 

i’m reaching

just a lost sheep

little black sheep

with mud

on her face

 

i’ve been

here before

and found

my way again

following Your light

 

i know

You never give up

on those You call

Yours,

like me

 

look for me

until

i remember:

i am

Yours

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Image

thru my lense: Big

IMG_20160717_105436

but it doesn’t feel like it
on the inside,
instead it’s fairly cozy

like a large living room
and we’re all family
even though i’m newly adopted

and the pastor feels like a brother;
he’s about the same age
as one of my real brothers

we sing songs too loud
and i wanna dance
and twirl in my floor length skirt

Jesus is big ’round here
even though our church feels small
and the cross is just about life-size

Quotes from Blue Like Jazz

On Saturday I started reading Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. It is amazing. I want to read everything he has ever written. I’ve only got a few pages left and I seriously want to just start reading it again as soon as I finish, it is that great. I can’t type the whole book here because that would be plagiarism or something like it and plus it would take a really long time, but I do want to share some of my favorite parts so far.

  • “Sometimes you have to watch somebody love something before you can love can love it yourself.”
  • “I spent an entire week feeling bitter because I couldn’t breathe underwater. I told God I wanted to be a fish.”
  • “(They hang there, the stars, like notes on a page of music, free-form verse, silent mysteries swirling in the blue like jazz.)”
  • “I want to marry a girl who, when I am with her, makes me feel alone. I guess what I am saying is, I want to marry a girl whom I feel completely comfortable with, comfortable being myself.”
  • “What great gravity is this that drew my soul towards yours?”
  • “Too much of our time is spent trying to chart God on a grid, and too little is spent allowing our hearts to feel awe.”
  • “They were books themselves, all of them were books, and what was so wonderful is that to them, I was a book too.”